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Contentment

Contentment. It's been a recurring theme in my life lately. 

I listen to podcasts while I drive, and two podcasts in the last week have talked about being content in where you are in life right now. This has been something I've struggled with through this adoption.
I love my job. I love being a wife. I love taking care of my dog. I love time with friends. I love being involved in our church. I love traveling, but right now, I'm having trouble loving these things because my desire to be a mom is so great.
We have been "in the process" for ten months now and likely have at least that long (if not more) left. I have wanted to be a mom since I can remember. We started praying about starting the adoption process over a year ago, and we truly thought we'd be farther along by now. Sometimes I feel as if I'm missing my calling-- that I'm called to mother a child right now, but I'm not. Not yet.
So, my prayer lately has been for contentment. Of course, I'm still praying for the process to go quicker and to be able to bring our baby home soon, but I'm also asking the Lord to give me peace and strength to do what I'm doing right now.
For now, I'm still called to love on my sweet hospice babies at work. I'm called love my husband. I'm called to do paperwork, email social workers, and wait. I'm called now to be in this adoption process and live in the unknown. I have felt myself trusting God more and becoming closer to Him through this process. It hasn't been easy, but I'm learning.
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Comments

  1. TB SorrellsAugust 5, 2019 at 7:26 PM

    Wow, Lenze...this is heartfelt and raw and real. Thank you for being so transparent as it helps me as I strive to be content in the “here and now” of walking with the Lord. I’m praying for you and Cody and the sweet child that God has already chosen to be yours...in His time. I love y’all.❤️

    ReplyDelete
  2. Travis CrossAugust 21, 2019 at 7:55 AM

    Continued prayers for both of you and all that you are seeking the Lord for.! Love you all! Pastor Travis

    ReplyDelete

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